Do you remember the classic children’s book, The Little Engine that Could, by Watty Piper? In the story, some toys were on a train that broke down and they needed help. They needed to get over the mountain to get to the children on the other side. The toy clown asked several passing engines for help. The Rusty Old Engine refused to help. Instead he said “I can not. I can not. I can not.” Little Blue Engine said “I think I can. I think I can. I think I can.”
As parents we do our best to communicate to our kids that they can accomplish anything they set their mind to …or do we?
Learned Helplessness
At Mathnsium of Warrenton we often hear students say “I can not” instead of “I think I can” when they are confronted with a challenging math problem. This attitude of learned helplessness can come from watching and imitating our parents. It can also come from not experiencing enough success.
Lead By Example
As parents you may not be in math class, but you still encounter learning opportunities daily. Every time you encounter a difficulty it is a learning opportunity. Every time you hear about an unfamiliar subject it is a learning opportunity. Children watch and learn how you approach these opportunities. Children copy their parents’ approach to learning opportunities. They do what you do, not what you say.
Be Intentional with your “Can do” Message
What do you do when you have a learning opportunity? Do you study the problem and try to solve it? With unfamiliar subjects, do you show interest and ask questions? If so, your children will internalize the “can do” mentality. If you say things like, “I was never any good at X, Y, or Z.” they will internalize the attitude of the Rusty Old Engine that said “I can not.” This attitude will limit their mathematical potential. Think back to The Little Engine that Could. Wouldn’t it have been cool if the toys learned to fix the broken engine themselves? But at least they asked for help instead of giving up on their mission.
Be on the lookout for learning opportunities. When you find one, point it out to your child. Let your child see you wrestle with it and stay positive. Then the next time your child has a really difficult math problem, you will have some street credibility when you say, “I know you can.” More importantly, they will copy your “can-do” attitude.
Please read our resources about how math mastery and attitudes and behaviors are linked together.
Call Carla of Mathnasium of Warrenton today at 540-349-9797.
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