Why should you never mention the number 288 in front of anyone?
Because it is too gross (2 x 144 - two gross).
Which weighs more? A pound of iron or a pound of feathers?
Both weigh the same.
How is the moon like a dollar?
They both have 4 quarters.
What is alive and has only 1 foot?
A leg.
When do giraffes have 8 feet?
When there are two of them.
How many eggs can you put in an empty basket?
Only one, after that the basket is not empty.
What coin doubles in value when half is deducted?
A half dollar.
What is the difference between a new penny and an old quarter?
24 cents.
If you can buy eight eggs for 26 cents, how many can you buy for a cent and a quarter?
8.
Where can you buy a ruler that is 3 feet long?
At a yard sale.